The Con Game

Went to All-Con last weekend, which is an anime/sci-fi/fantasy/etc. convention in Addison. An anime con is sort of like going to SCC-lots of people with a common interest that the general public don't really understand, dressing in outfits that range from beautiful to "What were you thinking?" with seminars and events. Though that's probably not a great analogy...

I went for the Saturday session; I was invited to be a judge an Anime Maid Competition. No, I didn't know what that entailed, either. Going to a con, you dress for comfort or you cosplay your heart out. I went for comfort-black pullover 3/4 sleeve top, black knee-length skirt with tulle trim, black knee-high combat-style boots (which I haven't worn in ages, dammit!) over black and white striped socks. Oh, and a red leopard-print corset from Timeless Trends. Yes, at this place it's casual and I just got it and wanted to wear it out, okay?

The contest was actually a lot of fun to watch and judge. There were two contests, actually. The first part was a look/portrayal contest, where you were supposed to look and act like an anime character. The second part involved hiding a table setting around the room and having to find it and put things back in place. That part was hilarious!

Afterward, I and a couple of friends went out to lunch and catch up. I then got to see a friend's apartment that she's using for her dressing/makeover business. I have to say it's a great place, and I wish her the best. Back to the hotel to hit the vendor's room; got a t-shirt and that's all this time. I didn't stay too late, wanted to get home and get dinner for everyone.

This was the first time I'd been out in the daylight since SCC. And I miss getting out and going to the shops or lunch or just doing stuff. I think I need to start getting back into practice. Also, my birthday was Monday; lots of good wishes and greetings, which were nice.

Filling in the gaps

It's been a while since I caught up, but I can't say it's been exciting. I have been out a few times, but it's been dinner at The Bronx and go to S4 afterward. Sometimes there's lots of girls, other times just a few. I wouldn't go to S4 it I wasn't meeting people, though. Although, I have met some new people there, even given them the address to the Dallas Feminine Expressions Meetup webpage. It's probably the best way to find out who is going out and what events are happening. With Metroplex CD Group now dead, and GEAR* no longer doing monthly regularly-scheduled meetings, I don't know how someone who was new to the area would find people. There is a Tri-Ess group in Ft. Worth, but since I'm not a hetrosexual crossdresser I'm not really their kind of girl...

Coming up? There's an anime convention in a couple of weeks that I've been invited to go to; will say more about this later. I do want to get back out to the goth clubs again. There's Panopticon on Fridays, and The Church on Thursdays and Sundays. I've got a few people interested in doing a Sunday night on a Monday holiday weekend; I'm not so picky.

*The Resource Center Dallas has not updated the GEAR page recently; it still lists the mixer.

Catching up

I went out twice in December, and both started as trans group related things. Early in the month I met a few people at Borders on McKinney for coffee before dinner; six of us showed up on a cold night. I wore a black Z. Cavaricci jacket over a pink tank top, Torrid black lace covered skirt, pink tights under crochet-finished tights and boots. We walked over to Hook, Line and Sinker for dinner. It's a very casual fish shack-fried and grilled fish, shrimp, etc. I had the fried shrimp (fresh and tasty), hush puppies (not so great) and fries (good). Talking to people over dinner, being social, is always a good thing. 

Afterward, went to Station 4 to meet up with people. S4 is kind of the gathering place for tgirls in town. It's a gay bar that's transgender friendly with a big dance floor, chill out room upstairs and drag shows in the Rose Room. I did run into some people I have not seen in a while, and that's always good. One funny thing was I went to the ladies room and ended up talking to women for at least twenty minutes about outfits and makeup and shoes. Just like normal girls do :)

The other outing was for the GEAR Christmas Party. Grey turtleneck sweater from Ashley Stewart, black skirt from Torrid, patterned tights over colored ones (I like the way it looks, and get lots of compliments), and boots. The party was nice, caught up with a couple of people I have not seen in a while. Then out to S4 which was actually a bit boring-just couldn't get into things that night I suppose. 

Packed things away for my mom's visit over the holidays. She doesn't know about Zelda, and at her age I don't see a reason why she needs to. Things went very well; everyone was happy, people were in a great mood and got some nice presents. I have to drive mom back and forth, which is not fun but she hates flying and I don't want her driving herself. 

Moved the girl stuff back last week, missed going out last Friday but went Saturday to S4. Went a bit gothy/wild with a black corset from Marvelous Mayhem, over a sheer top with a short petticoat I got off eBay years ago. Pink fishnet tights, black patent boots from Electrique Boutique, and the Z. Cavaricci jacket. A fun outfit, but didn't get many comments which I thought was surprising. Guess I need to try harder :P

This has been a very cold week so far-at least there is no snow. I don't mind the cold but not when it snows!

Briefly

Need to post about going out weekend before last, the holidays, etc. I'm doing well, just tired a lot...

What's been going on

Not as much as I'd hoped, I'm afraid. Busy with life, but not really getting out lately. I went to the GEAR mixer a couple of weeks ago; it's their monthly meeting and I had not been there in a while. It's at The Bronx in the gayborhood, which is always a nice place to go to. Unfortunately the turnout was a bit light-about ten people, and there really wasn't a meeting as such. I did get to chat with some people I didn't know, and afterward was introduced to Red Mango yogurt. It's like Pinkberry but I think it tastes better. A very short evening...

The Dallas Fetish Ball at The Church was a week ago. And as always, it's a mixed bag. I did find out that if you show up early-like when the doors open-you have a few hours before the place gets so crowded you can't see anything or move around. Between 10:30 PM-12:30 AM it's so packed you just kind of flow with the traffic inside. You'll be able to talk to people, see the outfits and enjoy things. I hate the fact that the "dress code" is very loosely interpreted. They don't bother to enforce it, so the crowd ends up with a mix of people who actually make an effort and the jeans/trainers/polo shirt crowd who look out of place. And to me it affects the whole mood.

I did meet some new people, which was great. But a friend had a bad experience at a nearby hotel. She'd parked in the garage and came back late Friday night-and was harassed by some homophobes. Fortunately she wasn't alone, but it was her first experience with being in real physical danger. I can totally understand how she felt, but I also think that you have to remember that when you are dressed en femme you need to think like a woman and take the same kinds of precautions.

Some people don't get it

I need to post about what's happened recently but I'll do that later. Right now, I want to talk about an entry in the Houston Post about the closing of a local lesbian bar. This isn't news-bars open and close all the time (more close than open in this economy, though). But one of the comments got me thinking:

So one gay bar closes, and gays and lesbians can go... anywhere in town they please, because they've become accepted into mainstream culture, as they should. A lot of places like Marys, and now Chances, are more relics of times when gays and lesbians had to flock to gay bars because they didn't feel comfortable outing themselves in public.

One would think that letting Montrose evolve from a segregated district that was formed to escape gay intolerence into a place that everyone can enjoy and be a part of would be a unanimously positive thing, but people have to bitch.

No, people bitch because we're losing part of our culture. It was a gay bar in New York City where the whole "gay liberation" movement got started. Gay and lesbian bars of all sorts were where you could meet and be accepted. If you think that mainstream bars are ready for us, read a little farther...

Which got this reply:

Um...that's pretty inaccurate, Anonymous, and rather ignorant. if you're a mainstream wealthy gay or lesbian, maybe that's true. But think outside your own experience.

Chances is an important place for lots of queer folks, mainstream and non-mainstream alike. The fact that they're replacing it with an expensive restaurant is just one more example of how non-mainstream gays and lesbians are constantly marginalized in society (so is your comment by the way!).

The reference to wealthy gays and lesbians sounds classist, but it's not. There really is a schism in the LGbt "community" and it's one of wealth, appearance (how "straight" you look and act) and privilege. If you're on the right side, you're all for mainstreaming because it goes with your lifestyle. If you're not so straight looking, if you're a drag queen or leatherfolk or a bit nelly or butch you're supposed to just stay at home because you're a risk to the privileged getting their "rights." Just let that bus roll over you, okay?

And this:

Ok seriously, you actually think queerfolk are actually accepted in mainstream society? We are accepted as novelties on tv and in the movies, but not as valued human beings in the "real world." As a shining example of this point(and the fact that Montrose is dying as a bastion and sanctuary for the queer community) I was out at a supposedly "everyone" bar(i.e. Not exclusively gay bar)with my boyfriend the other night to celebrate my birthday. He kissed me at midnight in celebration and the table next to us began making comments about how they " did not need to see that" and quite specifically "thats fine in the privacy of their own home, but in public? Eww" So Gide you tell me if we are accepted in mainstream culture? Keep in mind this was in MONTROSE! So yes we do need our own safe spaces! And yes we will express displeasure as we lose them! From what I've seen(and this isn't the only example of growing homophobia in what was once our Gayborhood) when you start gentrifying an area you displace the people and culture which were already there. And generally speaking, the people that come along with that gentrification tend not to be so open minded.

Ironically, if it'd been two lesbians kissing the next table would have probably been all "Oooh, that's hot!" because it's okay for two women to kiss and reinforce your little fantasies (even if they'd never let you near them in bed ever). Two guys kissing? DISGUSTING!

Yeah, we're so mainstream aren't we? Right...

Since I have lived here, Dallas has lost two LGbt bars. It also lost the only LGbt bookstore in town, which was a cornerstone of the Cedar Springs "gayborhood." A gay-owned leather shop closed because the rent was raised so high it was unaffordable (and that space is still empty, two years later). We're losing our community, one space at a time...

Little Zelda's trip to Southern Comfort, part seven

Addenda, thoughts, and What It All Means:

The package I left with the hotel to be shipped off on the Monday after SCC? I call Tuesday after checking the UPS web tracking and find out that no, it's still there because nobody gave it to the driver. They manage to get it on a truck Wednesday, and it was back in town by the weekend.

The nail salon in Atlanta that I love and forgot to name? Classic Nail, 4772 Ashford Dunwoody Rd.; the phone number is (770) 392-9135. Really, they did an excellent job and my nails still looked great the entire trip.

I have mixed feelings about the hotel this year. Because I used my Priority Club points to pay for part of my stay, I got upgraded to the Club Floor for free. I don't think I would have paid extra for the privilege, but it was nice. The room was great-the AC worked perfectly, very comfortable and clean. The water pressure in the shower was sometimes an issue, as was the temperature, but you could never find a pattern to the issue.

And the toilet kept flushing itself. I had to talk to the desk twice about fixing it, and the maintenance person who came up to fix it thought I'd called about a blocked toilet. Nice, people. I should not complain about the parking, since it is free if you do it yourself. But the garage is too small-I was almost unable to find a spot in it, and the valets were not very helpful.

Do I like the hotel? I've gotten used to it, but I miss the old place. It was closer to the center of town, and most of the places I wanted to go to were nearby. But it's no longer an option; now a W Hotel, there are not enough rooms for SCC.

I saved this to come back and finish it, and of course I published the frelling thing instead. So here's the rest of my post...


I've said before that I was thinking that this was going to be my last SCC. This year, I haven't felt the kind of anticipation or excitement that I usually do before the event. The SCCLounge was more of a chore than ever, and a few things happened that did not help my mood. People have been telling me they aren't going anymore. They don't feel like it's worth going to; they've gotten everything out of it they can; it's focused on things they aren't interested in; they're fed up with the "community."

And probably the first two days at SCC, I was still feeling that way. And then I started talking to people, and getting back into a "groove" at the event. It made me feel like there was something more there. Are there problems with SCC? Yes, but they can be fixed. The health fair was a good start; making AIDS/STD awareness an integral part of the programming should be continued. The "Princess Day" was a great idea, and needs to continue. There needs to be more discussion about the direction the convention is going to take. And more openness, less leaving people in the dark and wondering what's going on...

I've seen too often that people feel like they are being marginalized and not part of the "community" for a lot of reasons. There has always been the transsexuals who are on the One True Path to their "wholeness" who regard anyone who is not TS as fake. There are crossdressers who don't give a damn about the issues of transsesuals, and transsexuals who think crossdressers can't understand them. Transmen are often ignored because there's this concept that they have it easier than MTF's. And that's only part of it.

I don't have any answers. I screwed up enough this year. I was supposed to meet up with people and didn't because I got caught up in my own thing, and I feel bad about that. I don't want to be a flake, but I was one this year. I've tried to apologize to those concerned and hope that they're gracious enough to forgive me.

I did have a good time. There were some great moments-Wednesday at the mall, shopping and being a model. Dinner with a friend Thursday night and finding out that she's more fabulous than I thought. Getting a makeover Friday and looking fabulous and feeling blissed. Finding that I still had that goth girl inside and she's still fierce, and getting to see someone who I really wish I could keep more in touch with. And going to the Barber Museum and seeing motorcycles and cars I only knew from photos.

So yeah, I'll be back.

Little Zelda's trip to Southern Comfort, part six

Continuing the adventures, almost done...

Sunday:

Southern Comfort ends for me when I take the polish off of my nails. Getting a manicure and pedicure is one of the first things I do when I get to Atlanta. I can look down at my hands and see pretty nails and it reminds me that I'm Here, not There...

Taking a shower, doing just a minimal shave (I haven't done any kind of hair killing so I shave. A lot. And after a week...). Putting on drab for the first time in days always feels odd for a few minutes. No bra, just a wife beater under my shirt. No panties, briefs. Jeans that don't fit as closely, boy socks, Chucks...I'm now in my other drag-the one that lets me pass all the time. A part of me sighs...

Packing up took far less time than usual. Partly because a good part of my stuff was going back in a box, and that was just repacking it (and tossing a few things in to make sure my luggage weight was down). I know how backed up the bellmen will be-everyone wants to check out at the same time, and we bring a lot of stuff with us. I take my suitcase and hanging bag down to the car, since that's easy. When I am going back to the room I see a bellman on his way up and ask how long it'll take to get someone to pick up a box from my room; he says he'll be right there.

A half hour later, I give up and carry a forty-five pound box to the elevators and then to the bell stand, sign a form so it will be picked up on Monday (I've already put a prepaid shipping label on the box, and the hotel has a regular pickup) and drop it off. Turn in my room keys, see a few people I know in the lobby and say goodbye.

One of the more interesting things to do on the Sunday after SCC is to play "Spot the T-Girl;" see if you can recognize someone when they aren't looking their best, that is. I usually do pretty well with the game. Today, there's not a lot of people checking out yet so I leave without getting to play.

Since my flight was out of Birmingham later that afternoon, and I had plenty of time, I went to the Barber Vintage Motorsports Museum. It's located on the grounds of Barber Motorsports Park, just outside Birmingham in Leeds. I've always wanted to visit the collection. I like vintage motorcycles, and old racing cars, and the Barber has both in numbers. I'm an admitted gearhead, which surprises people for some reason.

The museum is big, but you can hit the highlights in two hours (which is what I had) with enough left to want to come back to spend a far more leisurely afternoon. There were two motorcycles I really wanted to see. First was the Britten. The first time I saw a picture of one, I couldn't imagine anyone ever building a more perfect motorcycle. It was the vision of one man, New Zealander John Britten, who wanted to create a V-twin racing motorcycle that was more advanced than anything built to that point. And he did it. Seeing it in person, all the incredible details, how it had just enough, no more...You know how you dream of something and fear that in person it'll be so much less? This was better.

The other motorcycle was more classic: the Vincent Black Lightning. Besides being the subject of one of my favorite songs, Vincent built the first superbikes. If you love sport bikes, you have to love Vincent. Seeing one, in all black and chrome and perfect, was worth the trip. Seeing a whole range of them was fantastic.

The Barber has a wide range of bikes-everything from the earliest to some of the newest, from utilitarian to art works. And cars-a tribute to John Surtees, the only man to ever win world championships on two and four wheels. It also has the largest collection of Lotus racing cars anywhere. By the time I left, I'd taken a ton of photos and memories to get me through my post-SCC downfall, I'd hoped.

I know, geeky car stuff in the middle of my SCC post, get over it...

Birmingham Airport has become a favorite-it's small enough to have everything close by. Dropping the car off and then walking across the road to the check-in counter-and no lines. I was there early enough to get something to eat (overpriced of course), and I'd already pre-checked in so it was wait for the plane and go home. We landed on time, baggage was off the plane quickly and I got to my car and back to the house sooner than I'd expected.

Oh, and I had managed to leave my iPod in the car. Nissan Versas have a little compartment over the vents that is perfect for putting your iPod in when it's connected to the stereo. And to be ignored when you're cleaning the car out. I call Hertz, leave a message, and totally expect not to see the thing again. Which is disappointing because it had been a Christmas present from the family. It's not new (4th generation), but it works fine for my needs and it's how I listen to music when I'm not at home. I haven't gotten used to using my Droid for that yet. I do hear from someone Monday, give them my info, and pretty much expect that's that.

Until Wednesday, when I get a call. They have my iPod, and need my credit card number to send it back. I eagerly give it, along with my mailing address. It's there in a couple of days, and I'll forgive them for the crappy packing (a sheet of bubble wrap that it slipped out of but the case protected it). So, Hertz in Birmingham Airport are good people.

Whew. I was going to sum things up in this post, but I think I'll do one more.